IS THREE THE MAGIC NUMBER?

“Somewhere in the ancient mystic trinity… you get three— as a magic number.” —Schoolhouse Rock

I have been asked by a few clients why I believe men are so commonly interested in threesome experiences with two women. It is far and away the most common male sexual fantasy. My answer is based upon the simplicity of men. What do men enjoy more than a cheeseburger? A double-cheeseburger. It’s that simple.

To most men like me, who appreciate the undeniable beauty inherent in the sensational natural curves and contours of a woman’s body— the only thing better than a naked woman is two naked women. One beautiful pair of breasts, lovely feminine hips, beautiful eyes, or soft lips is only sexier when doubled. For any man lucky enough to experience a sexual encounter with two women, he will never forget it. First is the abundance. For two women to sexually avail themselves to one man is very special. He cannot help but feel desired at a level which no mortal man is worthy. Having two women share his body with passion and enthusiasm will leave even the most modest man feeling like a king. After stepping out of a bed with two beautiful naked women who just finished worshipping him sexually feeds even the most humble man’s ego in a way that will leave him walking taller… forever. And for generous lovers who enjoy nothing more than bringing a woman to orgasm, the prospect of pleasuring two women is even more heavenly.

Jealousy or insecurity have no place in the threesome experience. If any of the three participants are prone to either, a threesome experience can be destructive. I once dated a woman who offered me a threesome on a milestone birthday. When I asked her why she needed to wait for my birthday, she said because it would be difficult for her to watch me enjoying another woman— she was jealous. But because she knew I would enjoy it, she was willing to bite the bullet and share me for one evening. I knew that would have been a recipe for disaster, so I passed on the offer. But I was extremely tempted because I thought I might not ever get another chance. (Don’t worry, I've had other opportunities. 😉) Nobody should suffer to please a partner sexually. However, every loving partner should seriously consider giving their sexual partner what they desire— at least once.

Unlike men, I have learned that women’s deepest sexual fantasies can be… terrifying. Men’s most common sexual fantasies (threesomes, BDSM, public or outdoor sex) pale in comparison to the sexual fantasies I have heard from women throughout my life. Women’s fantasies tend to be so much more… specific. A few times, I’ve been in a relationship with a woman when, usually after a few drinks, she’s loosened up enough to share some deep dark sexual fantasies. I find that they usually involve very specific elements. I have listened to women express in great detail the particular outfit she would be wearing (including specific undergarments and shoes), the particular song she would want playing in the background, the specific clothes worn by her fantasy partner(s), the layout of the room, the weather outside, and even the aroma of the candle she insisted would be burning. Her fantasy often has a deep plot and extensive backstory designed to build sexual tension and desire. By the time you get to the actual sex part of her fantasy, you feel as though you’re 80 pages deep into one of those paperback Harlequin romance novels with a long-haired handsome man on the cover. And when she gets to the sex part— I have learned to brace myself. (Another blog post more specifically about women’s fantasies will follow on a later date.)

Unlike men’s simple fantasy categories, women’s fantasies tend to include… props. Sometimes a device or specific sex appliance. Sometimes another very-specifically described participant or even several not-so-specifically described participants. Sometimes tools, hardware, furniture, or even a tarp may be included. Or possibly even an… apparatus. I have heard women’s honest and deeply-held sexual fantasies that still give me nightmares.

So when your male partner, to no surprise, admits that he would enjoy a sexual experience with two women— you should at least consider it. For one thing, you might like it too! I am always so surprised how dismissive many people are of their partner’s sexual desires. For many, the fantasy is superior to the actual act— and for them, once will likely be enough. As a confident and loving partner, there is very little I wouldn’t do for my lady if she told me it would thrill her sexually. For me, seeing her excitement would be enough reward for me to at least try to enjoy it for her.

Women are generally much more sexually fluid than men and more naturally open to a sensual experience with another woman. Unlike most straight men, many straight women have experienced kissing another woman or even regularly fantasizing about a sexual experience with another woman. For those women, a threesome experience might also allow her to scratch that itch and explore another woman’s body, or have her explore theirs. Other women without any desire to enjoy another woman might nevertheless be turned on by the prospect of a front row seat to watch their man pleasing or being pleased by another woman. I have spoken to several very straight women who have admitted that watching their sexy man ravage another woman was a surprising thrill that holds a permanent position in her masturbation parade. And there are also many women who admit that their first intimate encounter with another woman was a much sexier and more gratifying experience than they had expected.

And even women not squarely in either of those groups might simply enjoy knowing that they have selflessly given their lover the thrill of his lifetime. Like the woman who cares most about watching others open the Christmas gifts she has bought and wrapped (rather than opening her own gifts), some confident women actually celebrate knowing that she just enthusiastically and generously shared a sexual experience with her man that none of his buddies’ wives or girlfriends ever would.

So when your man musters up the courage to admit having the same fantasy as 95% of other men… don’t shut him down right away. No matter how insecure or jealous you might be. If he has been with you for a while, he already knows that your response is likely to be a hard “No.” Maybe during your next sexy session, after you’re satisfied and ready for it to be over, you can whisper in his ear, “you’d like another woman with us here right now, wouldn’t you?” So even without compromising your anti-threesome principles, you can still thrill your husband with open and nonjudgmental talk about his desire for one. Watch how quickly he responds.

And there is no more appreciative and loving person on earth than the man whose wife or girlfriend surprisingly participated in a threesome with him the night before.

Three is indeed a very magic number.

YoniMaster Rick