A SEASON OF GIVING…

Hello all of my followers! I’m wishing you all a very happy holiday season. Like many of you, I have been very busy with family and friends this holiday season— but I’m back to reconvene my biweekly columns for you all.

And this being a season of giving, I am hoping to impart a very important message to all of my followers looking to warm up their bedroom during these chilly winter months… GIVE YOUR PARTNER PLEASURE. Period. At least once, please for the ever-loving heavens above, lay your partner down, tell them to relax, and then service their body.

You probably already know what they like and how they like it. If you’re not sure, ask. If you’re too shy to ask, do something and then ask your partner if they like how it feels. If they like it, do it some more. If they don’t, try something else.

Our bodies are all sacred temples of pleasure- crying out for sexual attention. But women’s bodies, in particular, truly need loving and sensual attention.

Any woman who knows that she need only ask and she shall receive the loving, focused, tender attention of her lover is at an incredible advantage in life. To know that a fulfilling orgasm is always moments away allows a woman to harness all of her focus and attention elsewhere whenever and wherever needed. After all, she has the unique power and joy of sexual fulfillment from her lover at the ready. No longing. No frustration. At least not for long. Nor is she slowly dying inside while hoping that her partner will magically divine the unique skill and ability to satisfy all of her sexual needs.

And any woman willing to stop whatever she’s doing to answer her man’s call for sexual attention will enjoy a man willing to walk through fire to bring her a glass of lemonade. Women who truly and completely sexually satisfy and nurture their man will almost never be sorry they did. For they will enjoy regular reminders that a loved man is more loyal than even the most loyal canine.

So why do so many women sign up for a relationship with a man either uninterested or unable to satisfy them sexually? It’s because we do not teach women to value their sexual needs.

For example, I used to watch ‘Sex & the City’ on HBO. While I take some issues with its handling of many female and sexual issues, I find the arc of the character Charlotte (played by Kristin Davis) to be insightful. She is beautiful, refined, intelligent, kind, and clearly seeking her “Prince Charming” to travel through life with. She surely has a long line of willing suitors, but she eventually settles on Trey. On paper, he checks all of the boxes: wealthy, accomplished, handsome, intelligent, and he seems to really adore and appreciate her. But for a meddling mother, Trey seems the perfect man and they marry. Only after the marriage does Charlotte realize that her handsome husband is usually either unable or unwilling to satisfy her sexual needs.

Despite counseling and no shortage of effort from Charlotte, she eventually confides in her girlfriends that she is unsatisfied and she finally decides to divorce Trey.

When her bald, sweaty, bulldog of a divorce attorney, Arthur, brings her the final divorce papers to sign, in either a moment of weakness or of fate, Charlotte succumbs to his crude advance and sleeps with him. And her sexual experience with that man changes her life. For the first time, she encounters a truly giving sexual partner whose focus is on her pleasure— not his. Charlotte is so far out of Arthur’s league in the looks department that their union seems improbable at best. But what Arthur brought to Charlotte in the bedroom was a game-changer. And Charlotte had the wisdom to listen to her body’s repeated call for Arthur’s attention— until they united as a couple and eventually as husband and wife.

You see, Charlotte learned the value of sexual satisfaction after sexually starving for years in an unfulfilled marriage. What Arthur brought to Charlotte was akin to a starving woman being brought a gourmet meal for her to enjoy for the first time, along with a lifetime of gourmet meals to follow. Whenever she wanted or needed it.

And I really like that message of her character. Sexual fulfillment was not a top priority for Charlotte, and she clearly valued many other things more than her own sexual fulfillment. But she learned from her mistake and went on to happiness with her unexpected husband who always kept her fire burning in the bedroom. She was happy. Having access to a loving partner focused on her sexual satisfaction was more important than she’d ever known.

So in the spirit of giving this holiday season- look your partner in their eyes and tell them “tonight, I am going to take care of you honey!” And then do it. Let them feel your love in a sexual expression of generosity and affection. Give the gifts your partner wants most this season— in the bedroom.

You won’t be sorry.

Happy Holidays!

YoniMaster Rick